Welcome Edgeheads to an abbreviated version of the Edgeucation. Before I get e-mails complaining, there is a reason. I'm leaving for the airport as soon as my big ol' fingers type this bad boy out. I have an appearance in Toronto, followed by 10 days with my mom, and my buddy Mike's wedding. This means no Edgeucation next week. I know, I know, like Lance Storm would say, I'm slacking, but fear not, I'm home for quite a while after that.
Moving on to not-so-important matters, my summer of rock continues. On Tuesday night, Bubba Ray Dudley, his better half and I attended the Skid Row, Vince Neil and Poison concert. Hey, I still enjoy good, fun rock 'n' roll, and I've always been a Skids fan. During Skid Rows set, it was relayed to me that the band wanted me to sing the shouting chorus on one of its new songs, "Thickskin." CHEAP PLUG ALERT: Its a song which is on Skid Rows new CD, of the same name, released last Tuesday. I pulled it off and, surprisingly, actually got a pop from the crowd.
From there, I went to the side of the stage to watch the rest of the set. They closed with "Youth Gone Wild," but not before guitarist, and buddy, Dave "Snake" Sabo handed me his guitar and pushed me back on stage. OK, I've only been playing four months. At first, I was the proverbial deer caught in the headlights, or a crowd watching a La Resistance match. I quickly snapped out of it to hear Snake tell me they were in G. From there, I was a Pete Townsend wind-milling machine (OK, maybe not quite, but it's a cool visual). I also just realized that three-fourths of the people reading this will have no clue who Pete Townsend is, but oh well. Suffice it to say, the Edger had a great time on stage. I can definitely see why Chris Jericho enjoys Fozzy so much. It's a completely different rush from what we do, while still sharing so many similarities.
After the show, the fun continued on the Skids bus. Now, for those of you who know me, you realize I'm not much of a drinker (except during the hockey playoffs). Between my trip to Calgary and this week, I think Bradshaw would have been proud. The Skids had a beer funnel, and this was a new experience for me. It was also a last experience for ye olde Edgemeister. After two, I tapped out quicker than Doink to a Crossface, or quicker than I did to Lance's. This was followed by Chris' baby shower, which once again ended with your faithful leader somehow slightly inebriated (maybe more than slightly). After some intense games of drunken Balderdash, it was time to leave and get some rest at my mom's this week, where I'm sure she'll fatten me to immense proportions. Thankfully, my weight is back up to 245 pound, which I have not sat at in a while. Mom should get it to 250.
Time to hit the ol Edgesack (not literally). A lot of the female demographic seem to be interested in who I would pick for a Diva for a manager, if I felt the need. While Stacy Keibler and I would be very tall and very blond, I somehow see Trish Stratus and I doing some cool things (get your minds out of the gutter). But I think I'd have to go with my girl, Lita. I believe we could do some cool, innovative stuff together (once again, minds out of the gutter) and we look like polar opposites. Actually Gail Kim would work too, what with the matching PVC trench coats, and it doesn't hurt that I find Asian women beautiful. But to be honest, I like flying solo. That way, if anything goes wrong, it's my responsibility, no one else's.
Once again, according to my very unofficial poll, it seems SmackDown! is the show that I should return to in the eyes of the fans. I have to admit, I see my opponents, who right now would be Eddie Guerrero, Rhyno, Big Show, and now Brock Lesnar, and that excites me (in a manly way, of course). Plus, it looks like Kurt Angle needs some serious help.
Well, every time I take an extended break I ask for feedback, so I can return to thousands of e-mails. My query this week involves little ol' me writing a book. Would you read it, especially if yours truly actually wrote it? No ghostwriters. Or is it too soon? Let me know.
Until next time, you have been Edgeucated.